Experiencing God

“Mine eye mourneth by reason of affliction: Lord I call daily upon thee – I stretch out my hand unto thee.”  

Psalm 88:9 KJV

So, in less than one week, I had already offended God two times for sure, and more if He was doing the counting. And I really struggled with what to do, considering the recent sermons that Pastor has been preaching, and Bible Studies that He has been teaching focusing on sins. We had not heard about sins for some time because, presumably, we have all been delivered, if we have given our life to Christ. We are new creatures and old things are passed away. So, for many years, it was ok to think that you were okay because Jesus has paid the penalty for our sins.

We have been taught that He died in our place; that sin is missing the mark, and the ultimate disobedience, inherited by us because of Adam’s Fall (Genesis 3). And we were comfortable with that; knowing that God confronted Adam and Eve in the Garden and provided a covering for them so that they would not stand before Him in shame. He dealt with Adam. He dealt with Eve and He dealt with the Serpent, and we learned that there are consequences to sin. But this is an age-old story, and somehow down through the years, we managed to convince ourselves that we are alright, because of what Christ has done. We understood that once saved – always saved; that you can never lose your salvation, and for years we sang the victory songs. We went about our business, assured of our eternal security; Casting our cares because He cares for you; Entering into His gates with Thanksgiving, and into His courts with praise; and we thought we were ok.

We come to church. We pay our tithes. Sometimes we came out to Prayer Meeting & Bible Study, and we are careful to meet and greet those that we like. By all appearances, we look ok. Then Pastor started preaching about Christianity for Grown Folks. He started preaching and teaching about our selective fellowship, and how there can be no real relationship with the Father if we have no fellowship with one another. It was the reality, for sure, that God is watching our lives. He is Jehovah El Roi (God Who Sees)! Even though His Son paid the penalty for our sin, by His death on the cross, burial, and resurrection, He really is not through with us yet. There are a lot of things that I may do, say, and think that you would never know about – But He does! There are a lot of places that I may go, and you would never know – But He does! I can put on my best and look great, and you would never know how I feel – But He does! There have actually been times when I wanted to break fellowship with Him because I felt like the offense was too great; that He would not understand. Like Adam & Eve, I felt too ashamed to be in His presence. Wanting to hide, I looked for a way out, but He found me. And since He covered me this time, like He has done so many times before, I had no choice but to bow my knees and confess my sin. I had to agree with Him about me, and to receive His forgiveness yet again. Following Jesus Christ is the process of His choosing me but growing up spiritually is me choosing Him. In those times when I know that I have offended Him, I can confess it, or I can pretend it never happened – But He knows!

Submitted by Deaconess Irene Gardon


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