Shiloh Baptist Church

I wonder if I would sound like Carol, Donna, or Marissa if handed a microphone, and asked to sing. Alone in my car, I think I come pretty close. But as much as I wish I could, singing is not my calling. I do okay with the sanctuary choir, and I’m really good in the shower, but publicly – not so much. As much as I love praise and worship, I think I can cross singing of my list. So during my morning mediation just the other day, yet again, I wondered what God has purposed for me, and I confess that I have most probably looked in all the wrong places, and at other people, coveting their gift – wanting to live a life of significance.

 

I have often struggled with purpose, and question when I might do that great work for the Lord. I have a short list of things that I think I can do, but none of them seem significant enough. But I can hear my Savior calling. So in that moment during my mediation, I told Him again that where He leads me I will follow [even with one eye open] just in case He needs my help. Truth is, living a life of significance requires great sacrifice, and I don’t know if I’m ready. When called to His purpose we may have to pass the endurance test, and I don’t know if I can go the distance. Sometimes where He takes us is not really where we want to go. This year, my brother lost his wife, who had just turned 60, and I didn’t want to go there. My husband lost his oldest brother, and I didn’t want to go there. Sometimes God’s purpose takes us places that would never choose for ourselves, and while we declare that we want His will, I wonder.

 

I think I would like to be the next Martin Luther King, doing great things for humanity, having great impact in the World, not for notoriety, or fame, but merely to serve God, but I don’t think I could turn the other cheek. The older I get, and with each passing year, I wonder when He’s going to call me to that great thing, and if I’ll be ready. For a certainty, I know that God’s calling on our lives is not fantastic. We’re not just living, waiting for something to happen, and to jump in. His will for our lives is an expression of His love for us. So while in my mediation thinking about what He would have me to do, I surrendered again accepting that He knows what’s best for me. While His path may be a path of pain, life’s delays, difficulties and problems builds character in our lives and cause us to trust Him, in ways that I could not otherwise. Our Lord honors faith, and He promises wisdom for our next step. He wants us to understand His will. If we try to figure out everything in our lives, we become very frustrated, doing what we feel His will is, and allowing others to direct us. The error is that we don’t ask for His direction. We act on our feeling. Our feelings are unreliable, and our minds too finite.

 

God’s will is rooted in relationship. When we get to know Him, what we think becomes secondary. When I asked him again, He said, ‘You already know what I want you to do with your life! Why haven’t you done it?’ and much like the conversation He had with Job when Job questioned His purpose, to me, He said, ‘How much longer will you go to the end of another day, week, or year without doing what you already know to do? What are you waiting for?’ Selah.